-Today we look at the Saturday Night’s Main Event from October 1985.
-SNME #2 was shown on NBC on October 5, 1985. It was recorded October 3, 1985 from the Brendon Byrne Arena in East Rutherford, New Jersey. It got an 8.3 rating on NBC and there were 8,000 in attendance.
-Mean Gene Okerlund is with Fred Blassie and Nikolai Volkoff. Volkoff says he’s going to beat Hulk Hogan for the title and is going to take the belt back to Russia.
-Hulk Hogan says rest easy. Volkoff is no threat to him or America.
-Mean Gene is with Hillbilly Jim and Uncle Elmer. They are trying to make sure that everything is ready for the wedding and the reception tonight. Roddy Piper comes in and asks if Elmer is going to marry a pig.
-Opening Credits.
-Vince McMahon welcomes us to SNME and runs down that night’s show before bringing in Jesse Ventura. This is prime 70’s-early 80’s Vince with a notwithstanding and then from there in his vocabulary. Jesse is not interested in love, just in the wrestling. The wedding has no business in wrestling he says.
-WWF Championship Match/Flag Match: Hulk Hogan VS. Nikolai Volkoff with Fred Blassie: Volkoff does the Russian Anthem gimmick to start. Hogan talks to Mean Gene. He says the Russian Flag is too much so he’s bringing Old Glory. Hogan stealing Jim Duggan’s gimmick and he comes to the ring to Stars & Stripes Forever. Interesting. Hogan is also in all white. Volkoff attacks at the beginning and wraps Hogan’s shirt around his neck. Hogan comes back. He hits a big clothesline. A right hand finally knocks Volkoff down. A big boot knocks Volkoff out onto the timekeepers table. Hogan runs Volkoff into one post, but Volkoff knocks him off of another one. Back in, Volkoff concentrates on the back. Hogan knocked down and then Volkoff raises Hogan over his head and then delivers a big backbreaker. Volkoff yells at the crowd instead of going for the cover. Big Irish whip to Hogan into the corner buckle. Hogan reverses a backbreaker attempt. Volkoff concentrating on Hogan’s throat. He gets a two count. Hogan hulks up. He hits several big shots. Volkoff misses a corner charge. Leg drop and a three count. Hogan grabs the Soviet Flag and shines his shoes with it before throwing it down and spitting on it.
-Mean Gene interviews Hulk Hogan. Hogan says if Volkoff didn’t get the message, they can go at it again. He then says that he is excited for the wedding and excited that Mean Gene is going to be playing the organ.
-They show Joyce getting ready for the wedding and Jesse wonders if the dress is off white.
-Mean Gene interviews the Hillbillies about Uncle Elmer’s Match and Wedding. Elmer says that he isn’t worried at all.
-Uncle Elmer with Cousin Junior and Hillbilly Jim VS. Jerry Valiant: Music Dub City as Uncle Elmer comes down. The Hillbillies do some dancing before the match. Valiant pushes Elmer who slams him and pins him. It’s over real quick. They say that 6 seconds is the recorded time. The Hillbillies dance again. They show the old record: King Kong Bundy at WrestleMania, which was about 24 seconds, but never let the truth get in the way of a good story, am I right?
-Mean Gene interviews The Hillbillies again. Elmer says Valiant shouldn’t have even taken his clothes off.
-Brandon Tartikoff and Arnold Schwarzenegger are shown in the crowd.
-The Body Shop with Jesse Ventura: Ventura’s version of Piper’s Pit. Jesse is in the ring for this and his guest is Bobby Heenan. They talk about Paul Orndorff firing Heenan on national television. They then talk about the bounty that Heenan has on Orndorff being raised to $50,000. Heenan says it would be his pleasure to give that money to Roddy Piper if he takes out Orndorff.
-Mean Gene talks to Paul Orndorff. Orndorff says nobody is man enough to take him out, especially Roddy Piper. He heads to the ring.
-Mean Gene then talks to Roddy Piper. Piper says he came to get rid of Orndorff and get $50,000 and if he gets rid of Orndorff and Bobby Heenan doesn’t pay him, he’ll rip his throat out too. He says if Uncle Elmer gets married, there may be more Uncle Elmer’s running around and Mean Gene acts like he gets physically ill.
-Paul Orndorff VS. Roddy Piper: Piper is played out by a bagpipe group. Bobby Heenan comes out and shows the briefcase of money. They slug it out to begin. Piper with the early advantage slamming Orndorff down on the canvas. Back and forth. They are brawling. It goes to the outside and they throw chairs and hit each other with the table. Back in, Orndorff hits an elbow from the top and then a German suplex. Piper does a classic eye poke. Piper goes for a splash, but Orndorff gets his knees up. A body press by Orndorff and they both spill outside. They both get counted out and brawl to the back. Piper gets to his dressing room door and Orndorff tries to get in but can’t.
-It is time for the wedding. This is a train wreck, and I am an authority on train wrecks.
-Mean Gene is shown “playing” the organ. Joyce comes down. Jesse is classic here culminating with his “two carp on the Mississippi” line. Andre the Giant and Hulk Hogan hold the ring ropes for Joyce to step in. Andre is in wrestling trunks and Hogan is in jeans, boots, a tuxedo shirt with the arms cut out, and a bowtie. Classy. Jesse can hardly keep it together watching the wedding. Someone throws something from the crowd and it hits Joyce but she continues with her vows. Elmer struggles to put Joyce’s ring on and he says he can’t hear the official. Jesse is now laughing openly. Roddy Piper comes out to break up the ceremony because he says there is no room for romance in wrestling. Hulk Hogan starts to leave to go after Piper, but Piper leaves. They are announced as married and Jesse delivers his famous line.
-They show the barnyard dressed up for the reception.
-Mean Gene interviews Big John Studd, King Kong Bundy, and Bobby Heenan. They say that it is time to put the end to Andre the Giant.
-Andre the Giant and Tony Atlas with Lou Albano VS. Big John Studd and King Kong Bundy with Bobby Heenan: Flashback to Bundy and Studd attacking Andre. Andre and Bundy start. Andre with the advantage. Andre attacking Bundy and choking him with the strap of his singlet. Atlas tagged in. Bundy takes over but misses an elbow. Studd tagged in. Back and Forth. Atlas misses a dropkick. Studd takes over but Andre grabs him and hits a headbutt. Bundy comes in and splashes Atlas. Atlas tags Andre. Andre and Studd square off. A choke and a big boot by Andre and Studd falls outside of the ring and Bundy goes after Andre. Bundy hits the avalanche in the corner on Andre. The bell rings as Andre comes back against both heels. They double team Andre. Hogan comes down to help Andre. The heels retreat.
-Mean Gene comes into the ring to interview Hulk Hogan. He said that Tony Atlas and Andre had things handled, but the heels double teamed them and he had to help.
-They show Mean Gene and George Steele at the zoo.
-Mean Gene talks to the Dream Team. They show footage of them winning the titles. They say they will take on anyone at any time. Barry Windham and Mike Rotunda are shown in the crowd.
-WWF Tag Team Championship Match: The Dream Team Brutus Beefcake and Greg Valentine with Johnny V VS. Tony Garea and Lanny Poffo: Poffo and Beefcake start and Poffo is in control. Valentine comes in and breaks things up. Beefcake gets a two count. Garea tagged in. A flying body press by Garea gets a two count. Valentine tagged in. He gets Garea down and gets the figure four on him for the submission.
-Uncle Elmer and Joyce’s wedding reception. Jesse is busy writing a poem. Lanny Poffo recites his own poem for the couple. Hillbilly Jim gives a toast to the couple. They bring in Tiny Tim. He presents a ukulele to the couple. Jesse finally recites his poem.
“There’s always a place in life for love,
A place for the lilies, a place for the doves.
There’s always a time in life to care,
A time to cuddle and a time to share.
Yes, a time and a place for everything,
A time to dance and a time to sing.
Now I’ve seen your dance, and I’ve heard your song,
And I must tell you…that this is WRONG!!!!
That wrestling is a deadly dance, and is no partner to romance.
And shame on those who ever did mix,
Wrestling and romance just for these hicks!
-Hulk Hogan and Paul Orndorff go after Jesse, who backs away and gets tripped by Hillbilly Jim and falls into the cake.
-They say that King Kong Bundy and Big John Studd have accepted the challenge of Hulk Hogan and Andre the Giant for the next SNME.
-Vince signs off from New Jersey.